red gf diary (2)

lokasi ; cheras, kuala lumpur

haah

da beberapa hari dok uma kat cheras ni.

bosan jgak lahh.

yela, sorang2 aje kann.

xde wape pun. adess.

siang td la,

nga bosan2, jenguk luar tingkap.

nampak red gf aku dok parking 

ehe

seb bek parking elok bawah pokok

xla berpanas sgt gf merah aku tu

pastu, bkak pintu uma,

kluar.

pegi kat satria merah kesayangan aku ue

bkak pintu, start keta.

panaskan enjin.

ehe. da lama xpanaskan enjin die

then, tgk2 la body die.

sian, berdebu.

haish, nak basuh, air xde.

yela, apartment kan.

then stop enjin,

lock pintu. haah. lepas sikit rindu kt gf merah aku tu.

hehe

then, ptg td, ujan lebat.

ehe. carwash semulajadi.

kilat da sikit gf aku tu.

terimakasih en.hujan

ehe. 

have a good rest ye red gf.

nanti kita jalan jauh.

dari kl ,balik melaka.

continue our journey again.

take care, cik satria merah

:)

lost in mid way

find my path.

by myself

again.

:que:

get it clear for you .

heyy.

jie, i wanna tell you something.

yeah, saya baca blog awak.

latest two post yg awak tulis.

i wanna make it clear for you.

just read and listen .

up to you mau percaya atau tidak. :)

shahira zakaria

a new name for me

not so new la

bekas skulmate sakti dulu

masa skul dulu, jarang tegur2 ngan die.

tegur gitu2 je la.

but then, after few years, tetibe die contact sy.

saya anggap dia kawan.

hanya kawan.

but unfortunately, dia anggap saya lebih dari kawan.

i'm pretty terkejut ngan statement die tu.

yeah, tetiba aje kann.

starts kat fb la.

bila sy tanya dia, dia ckp,

"saya dah lama admire awakk "

ouch. 

but still, saya mcm percaya xpercaya.

frankly speaking,

saya hanya selesa berkawan ngan dia.

yeah, baru2 ni die ada balas2 komen kat status.

saya pun ada.

maybe kami nampak agak 'mesra'

but u know what,

since the beginning, saya xberminat nak ambil dia jd gf.

because, she's not my type.

so much far from you.

yang saya xleh nak adapt.

setakat kawan mesra2 bole lahh.

more than that, agak tough bg saya.

plus, saya kurang tertarik pada perempuan yg agak rendah.

pelik kan.

awak, awak nak tau tak.

saya dah berapa kali dah reject dia.

but yet, she still keep coming for me.

yeah, maybe good things for me , dlm mata awak.

but not for me.

bub saya xmengharapkan dia.

awak je tau saya harapkan siapa.

kan awak ?

awak mungkin boleh blame saya bub seolah2 beri dia harapan.

harapan palsu.

kan awak kan.

yeah i should be blamed for that. 

i admit it. its my natural.

sebab saya xterikat kat mane2 perempuan pun.

so, logically, its okay for me 

kalau mau layan karenah sape2.

*i know i'm sucks.

tp ingat tak,

malam semalam kita ym smpai pagi.

mungkin awak tak perasan.

after that, saya tak layan dia sgt.

die ada text saya.

saya xbalas pun.

i'm so glad awak panggil saya "papa"

even sekejap.

saya tau awak tak perasan.

tapelah awak.

saya agak terluka.

ngan post latest awak.

but its okay.

saya maafkan awak.

always maafkan awak.

just hoping kita boleh ym lagi malam ni.

just hoping.

:jie jie:

red gf diary .

haah.

hari ni jalan jauh sgt ngan keta aku. gf aku la. hehe

dari johor ke kl.

first time drive long distance.

seronok. cuma letih sikit lahh. 

biasela, first time kan.

mybe sebab gf sy ni manual kot. tu yg penat sikit meyh. :)

aku travel berdua je ngan abg aku. 

alhamdulillah, sumenye selamat.

i'm pretty proud of my lil red gf.

ehe. bole pegi 140kmj kot jalan straight.

selekoh, 100kmj bole steady lagi.

stereng best. yela, power stereng kan. hehe.

kira baik la untuk kereta lama cm tu kan.

kira baik la untuk new drier mcm aku ni kan.

hehe

masa mula2 travel, jalan kampung, oke la.

bwk smooth je.

berbelas2 kereta jugak ah aku potong. hehe

pastu, kat area n9, ada road block lak.

seb bek xde speeding time tu.

double line x potong.

seat belt pakai.

so, dengan senyuman la tgk pakcik polis tu

hehe.

dari endau, dalam 12.15p.m

smpai cheras, 5.15p.m

dalam 5jam la dok dlm keta tu.

keras kejung kaki.

haha

tapi nak xnak, kena biasakan jugak.

yela, nanti kat melaka nanti, mesti banyak drive gak t kan.

anyway, i do have great time with my red gf.

we getting know each other very well lah.

haha

so, i'm hoping that our journey go smooth for future time.

i know, as long as i take a good care of her,

she will do the same to me.

ehe

terima kasih ye cik satria merah saya.

:)

should i ?

hmm. 2.15 a.m

mata ngantok sikit2.

da lama da online facebook.

then, tibe2 nampak si dia online

my ex

suddenly rindu die

i don't want to. but still, rasa rindu

tgk gambar die,

she's pretty cute with her short pixie haircut

hmm. then i/m la ngan dia

saje tanye, "sihat da?"

sebab die demam day before

die balas pendek je

entahlah , rasa macam ganggu die pulak.

then, borak sikit2

xlama pas tu die ckp, 

"gtg"

so, okay la. i say my gudnite

ingatkan die off line

but almost 1 jam kemudian ,

dia still stay online

but i stay quiet.

n terfikir

"mungkin dia tengah borak ngan membe die"

"mungkin die dah pun lupakan aku"

"aku dah bukan sape2 lagi kat die agaknye"

terkilan sikit

but don't worry

i will try my best to erase you

although it is impossible

although i know i'm lying myself

tapelah jie, awak jaga diri elok2 ye.

saya dah lama maafkan awak.

jangan risau.

:)

dear god .

i do have admirers .

quite a lot of them. 2 digit in numbers

too many comes , but yet too many being rejected by me

around 12 girls, i break their heart by saying 'NO, I'M NOT INTERESTED' .

sorry. so sorry. 

but i don't wanna give you guys fake love.

it's okay if you guys hate me.

much better than love me. 

sometimes i'm looking the answers for all this.

i'm always asking myself

"why do i can't accept all these girls?"

one reason, maybe i do not have any feelings towards them.

and other reason, maybe i do still,

having hope with my ex love.

i know, she wouldn''t come back to me.

she do have her own life that she chose to lead

but i don't know , 

why do i still keep reserving this empty space for her.

she's too hard to forget.

she's my personal tattoo.

she's my personal drugs.

i know, i looked stupid.

for having hopeless hope.

dear god , please ,

meet me with someone 

who may wash off my mind from her

who may gives me strength

who may gives me courage

who may gives me peace

who may give me faith

who are willing to share almost anything with me

who care for me 

who may gives me my true smiles and my laugh back

who are willing to be there for me when i need her

who may gives me the true love

...

as i get that , i will promise myself,

to be the same to her, like i said above.

to love her , fully heart.

open my heart

and

meet me my true love , god.

:i hope so:

love stories ?

i need someone not anyone 

. 

haven't found someone yet . who are able to touch my soul .

dear god , show me the one .

which i may say ily every single day .

:i am lonely: